Brian Bosworth plays a policeman who doesn't play by the rules. He is already suspended before he fucks up a few guys who are trying to rob a supermarket. He gets put on extra super bad suspension then and is, kind of, blackmailed by the FBI to go undercover and try to bust a motorcycle gang. He infiltrates the motorcycle gang with minimal effort. Soon enough he is eyeballing the leaders girlfriend. Throw in a major "jail break" scheme and we have an action classic on our hands!
There is really no reason why this movie flopped at theatres when it was released. The movie has everything that an action movie needs to suceed. Let's investigate...
- While Brian Bosworth isn't a great actor, he does a solid job as a wisecracking, sarcastic lead.
- The movie has solid bad guys. We get Lance Henriksen as the gangs leader. Lance Henriksen doesn't fuck up movies, he makes them great. He plays his role differently, definitely bad ass but with a little jokester thrown in. We also get William Forsythe as his right hand man. He fucks up everyone in his way and has a great motorcycle chase/shootout with Brian Bosworth. When William Forsythe is on, he is on, and he is on here.
- Whoever plays the girlfriend of Lance Henriksen's character (way too lazy to look it up) is a mega babe. I'll have to see if she is in any other movies. Let's check... Ok, her name is Arabella Holzbog. It looks like she is in Carnosaur 2. I'll have to check that out. It looks like she is in a couple episodes of Red Shoe Diaries, so maybe there is some tit action somewhere, I don't know, I'll have to look into that when I'm not at work! Anyway, Arabella Holzbog, major babe! There are a decent amount of boobs on display here, so it's got that too.
- The ending. The action throughout the movie is great, fist fights, shoot outs and motorcycle chases. Well, the end battle goes in every direction, with excellent gun fights and lots of blood. It must really be seen to be believed. It's almost silly how over the top it is, but I couldn't help but love it because of how the action/violence level flies into the stratosphere. A completely grand way to end a great movie.
This is easily purchased on DVD for less than $10 and it worth three times that. Highly recommended!!!
Thursday, March 10, 2011
Monday, March 7, 2011
Cyborg... an awful, awful, awful, awful movie...
Cyborg is a post apocalyptic action movie from 1989. It is about a fighter who is payed to take a Cyborg across the country, where her knowledge will be used to better humanity. Unfortunately, the cyborg is kidnapped by a ruthless gang and it is up to the fighter to rescue her.
This is an early starring vehicle for Jean Claude Van Damme, who had been and would be in, much better movies. The plot here never advances past my description of it. It's simply one chase scene or fight scene after another. That might sound like a recipe for success but it is not here. The fight scenes are awkwardly staged and aren't very exciting at all.
The acting is terrible too, especially from the lead bad buy. All he does is yell. His fighting skills suck too. He seems stuck in slow, lumbering giant mode, even though he really isn't a lumbering giant. He definitely drags the movie down a lot.
Cyborg features the one thing that can ruin any movie. A miniscule plot that runs its course after an hour, except the movie still have thirty minutes left in it. Fuck, I was suffering towards the end. The fact that I found this enjoyable when it was a frequent Saturday afternoon movie, makes it even harder to watch now. Maybe the commercial breaks every ten minutes or so broke up the movie enough that I didn't notice the lack of quality. Who knows?
I do know now that the movie was an effort to sit through.
Fun fact: Cannon Films, who released Cyborg, had initially planned on making Masters Of The Universe 2 and Spider Man. Both of those films were not made but the set and preproduction had been completed, so Cannon was in a scramble to save some money. The script for Cyborg was created in a weekend and utilized the sets made for the two aformentioned movies.
Anyway, Cyborg... avoid!
This is an early starring vehicle for Jean Claude Van Damme, who had been and would be in, much better movies. The plot here never advances past my description of it. It's simply one chase scene or fight scene after another. That might sound like a recipe for success but it is not here. The fight scenes are awkwardly staged and aren't very exciting at all.
The acting is terrible too, especially from the lead bad buy. All he does is yell. His fighting skills suck too. He seems stuck in slow, lumbering giant mode, even though he really isn't a lumbering giant. He definitely drags the movie down a lot.
Cyborg features the one thing that can ruin any movie. A miniscule plot that runs its course after an hour, except the movie still have thirty minutes left in it. Fuck, I was suffering towards the end. The fact that I found this enjoyable when it was a frequent Saturday afternoon movie, makes it even harder to watch now. Maybe the commercial breaks every ten minutes or so broke up the movie enough that I didn't notice the lack of quality. Who knows?
I do know now that the movie was an effort to sit through.
Fun fact: Cannon Films, who released Cyborg, had initially planned on making Masters Of The Universe 2 and Spider Man. Both of those films were not made but the set and preproduction had been completed, so Cannon was in a scramble to save some money. The script for Cyborg was created in a weekend and utilized the sets made for the two aformentioned movies.
Anyway, Cyborg... avoid!
Wednesday, February 23, 2011
The Unholy...
I frequently think back to the glory days of VHS. Obviously, you can tell that from reading this blog. One title that caught my eye at the video store was The Unholy. The box design had a cool black and red theme, with a demon, complete with an evil, glimmering eye, in the background. One look at that and it was a must rent! The store that I frequented at the time had a big poster for the movie on the front window, so even if you missed the VHS box, you certainly weren't missing the front window.
The Unholy is about a demon who murders sinners in the act of sinning. This sends their souls to hell. A priest discovers this and must stop the demon. This falls firmly into the genre of religious horror, which has been done better and worse in the past. The movie has a lot going for it. The acting is way above par. They managed to grab some legit fantastic actors like Ned Beatty (who is great in everything that he is in) and Hal Holbrook. The rest of the cast is good too and the solid acting really helps raise the quality of the movie, especially since the script can get real silly in spots.
There is also a lot of practical gore, which also adds energy to the film. I remember a gory still in an issue of Fangoria, featuring an eviscerated man hanging upside down on a cross. That was definitely a memorable picture and moment in the movie!
The movie does run out of steam towards the end and seems a bit overlong, but this fact doesn't ruin the movie. In fact, the ending achieves a cool level of absurd ridiculousness that isn't really done in movies anymore. It's so over the top and silly, that it's hard to be like, "that's retarded, I hate this!" It was more like, "what the fuck, that is retarded, I love it!"
Anyway, The Unholy is a lost 80's horror movie with a religious twist that I think is worth a watch or two.
The Unholy is about a demon who murders sinners in the act of sinning. This sends their souls to hell. A priest discovers this and must stop the demon. This falls firmly into the genre of religious horror, which has been done better and worse in the past. The movie has a lot going for it. The acting is way above par. They managed to grab some legit fantastic actors like Ned Beatty (who is great in everything that he is in) and Hal Holbrook. The rest of the cast is good too and the solid acting really helps raise the quality of the movie, especially since the script can get real silly in spots.
There is also a lot of practical gore, which also adds energy to the film. I remember a gory still in an issue of Fangoria, featuring an eviscerated man hanging upside down on a cross. That was definitely a memorable picture and moment in the movie!
The movie does run out of steam towards the end and seems a bit overlong, but this fact doesn't ruin the movie. In fact, the ending achieves a cool level of absurd ridiculousness that isn't really done in movies anymore. It's so over the top and silly, that it's hard to be like, "that's retarded, I hate this!" It was more like, "what the fuck, that is retarded, I love it!"
Anyway, The Unholy is a lost 80's horror movie with a religious twist that I think is worth a watch or two.
Thursday, December 30, 2010
Midnight Movie...
One of my all time favorite places for horror movies to take place is a movie theatre. I think the general theatre atmosphere can only add to a movie, especially if it is supposed to be scary, exciting or both. The majority of Midnight Movie takes place in an old movie theatre. The cool old style ones, with only a few screens, a small concession stand and the hallway leading to the different screens. So already this movie had a lot going for it, imo.
The movie is about a rare screening of a horror movie. Well the director/star of the movie has been locked away in an insane asylum, but of course, he escapes on the eve of the showing. Well the movie plays and soon enough, characters from the audience start dying on the screen. It seems that the hulking killer from the movie can skip between the screen and real life.
In addition to the setting, the movie has a other things going for it. The first is a couple of likable characters. One of them is fairly amusing even, and has all the good lines. Since this is a slasher movie, we need well executed gore effects. This movie delivers a couple of those. I didn't think they were anything mind blowing, but they were certainly well done. A couple of the death scenes fall flat, but thats par for the course.
The design of the killer was pretty cool too. And I'll commend the movie for taking time to develop the characters before the killing starts.
It's not all good though. A few parts of the movie are dull. This is especially notable once the cat and mouse games start. You know, the killer has been chasing people around for a while, and you glance at the clock and there is still twenty minutes left. Hmmmm, not a good sign. The movie opens and contiues with a great pace but things progressivly slow down as the movie continues. I'm not saying that it's bad, because its worth a viewing or two, but had the initial energy been maintaing throughout the entire movie, I would have been much happier about the end results.
The movie is about a rare screening of a horror movie. Well the director/star of the movie has been locked away in an insane asylum, but of course, he escapes on the eve of the showing. Well the movie plays and soon enough, characters from the audience start dying on the screen. It seems that the hulking killer from the movie can skip between the screen and real life.
In addition to the setting, the movie has a other things going for it. The first is a couple of likable characters. One of them is fairly amusing even, and has all the good lines. Since this is a slasher movie, we need well executed gore effects. This movie delivers a couple of those. I didn't think they were anything mind blowing, but they were certainly well done. A couple of the death scenes fall flat, but thats par for the course.
The design of the killer was pretty cool too. And I'll commend the movie for taking time to develop the characters before the killing starts.
It's not all good though. A few parts of the movie are dull. This is especially notable once the cat and mouse games start. You know, the killer has been chasing people around for a while, and you glance at the clock and there is still twenty minutes left. Hmmmm, not a good sign. The movie opens and contiues with a great pace but things progressivly slow down as the movie continues. I'm not saying that it's bad, because its worth a viewing or two, but had the initial energy been maintaing throughout the entire movie, I would have been much happier about the end results.
Dolly Dearest...
A family moves to Mexico because the father has purchased a toy factory that makes world famous toys. He gets there to find a dilapidated factory, but fuck it, they already movied into an amazing house with maids and lots of space. He gives his daughter one of the leftover dolls and before you can say 'Child's Play rip off', his daughter is bonding with the animated doll. You see, this doll has been possessed by a Mayan spirit which was released from its tomb by a snoopy archaeologist. Fun fun fun. Soon enough, the daughter is having spastic fits whenever she is around a priest and mumbling ancient language curse words.
The whole movie is a play off of Child's Play, but it is pretty well done. There are a couple good scares and the doll animatronics are ok for the time. Denise Crosby looked hot from time to time, but here she didn't quite pull it off. Maybe it was the sweaty locations, but something seemed off with her.
There is scattered gore, but none of it is over the top or abusrd or anything like that.
This came out in a time when all the big horror franchises has already faltered and people were scrambling to find a new horror hero. Well, it wasn't Dolly Dearest.
That said, the movie isn't unwatchable but it's also far from great.
The whole movie is a play off of Child's Play, but it is pretty well done. There are a couple good scares and the doll animatronics are ok for the time. Denise Crosby looked hot from time to time, but here she didn't quite pull it off. Maybe it was the sweaty locations, but something seemed off with her.
There is scattered gore, but none of it is over the top or abusrd or anything like that.
This came out in a time when all the big horror franchises has already faltered and people were scrambling to find a new horror hero. Well, it wasn't Dolly Dearest.
That said, the movie isn't unwatchable but it's also far from great.
Wednesday, December 8, 2010
Creature...
This title immediately grabbed my attention due to its cool box art, the black alien in an outer space setting. I had seen pieces of this on Saturday afternoon TV but I had never seen the entire thing. It seemed to be a common movie at the time, since most rental stores of the day had a copy of it. In the 90's, when many video rental stores were closing, I bought a copy of it from the epic Movie World who were, unfortunately a casualty of Blockbuster. They always cut the VHS boxes to fit them into the white clamshell boxes that they rented, so the collector value of titles from that legendary store are pretty low, unless you find someone who just has to have a certain title. Creature was always in the science fiction section of that store, but a lot of other great titles were, as well.
Anyway, the movie is mostly about an alien offing people aboard a space ship. You see, they are on a rescue mission. They encounter a rogue scientist, who is the highlight of the movie. He is played by Klaus Kinski, who is pretty much wacked out in any role he plays. Another highlight of the movie is the tremendous gore. There is a lot of alien related violence. A lot of the aliens victims come back as zombies, so there is a lot of action in regards to that, as well. My favorite setpiece was the alien biting off a female characters head, blood splashing everywhere and then the head plops to the ground. It's a classic 80's gore scene, completely over the top and in your face.
As of now, Creature isn't readily available on DVD. There is a cheap public domain copy that shouldn't run you over $10. The quality is ok, but the colors are real soft, especially in scenes that take place in the light. I own two copies on VHS and they both look at least the same as the DVD. The movie doesn't cost you a lot if you track it down on DVD or VHS and is very worth checking out.
Anyway, the movie is mostly about an alien offing people aboard a space ship. You see, they are on a rescue mission. They encounter a rogue scientist, who is the highlight of the movie. He is played by Klaus Kinski, who is pretty much wacked out in any role he plays. Another highlight of the movie is the tremendous gore. There is a lot of alien related violence. A lot of the aliens victims come back as zombies, so there is a lot of action in regards to that, as well. My favorite setpiece was the alien biting off a female characters head, blood splashing everywhere and then the head plops to the ground. It's a classic 80's gore scene, completely over the top and in your face.
As of now, Creature isn't readily available on DVD. There is a cheap public domain copy that shouldn't run you over $10. The quality is ok, but the colors are real soft, especially in scenes that take place in the light. I own two copies on VHS and they both look at least the same as the DVD. The movie doesn't cost you a lot if you track it down on DVD or VHS and is very worth checking out.
Tuesday, November 23, 2010
Sorority House Massacre...
I remember, at the height of the home video boom, going to stores and selecting movies based off of the box art. There were so many titles that promised gold and delivered shit, yet they were big renters due to their superb cover art. Microwave Massacre comes to mind when I think of that situation. In hindsight, I was a young boy, so basically any box promising bloodshed and tits was going to be a hit and I did base many many many many movie rentals off of box art with a big titted babe on the cover. Sorority House Massacre was one of those rentals. I was already a slasher movie fan, and the cover art for this fed into all of my interests. It was a picture of a girl in a sexy outfit and there was a silhouette of a guy with a knife looking through the window at her. Haha! It's classic VHS cover art. I don't remember specifically, but the girl on the cover might not have even been in the movie. Back then, that was a common occurance, pictures of people on the cover who weren't even in the movie.
Through all my years of movie watching and collecting I have never seen a VHS of this besides the time that I rented it. It is on DVD now though. I often read reviews of this where people completely confuse it with Slumber Party Massacre. I think later sequels of that movie are tied into the sequel to this movie, so I think that is where the confusion comes from.
As a slasher movie, this one is ok. The set up is about a group of girl who are having a party at a house and one of the girls is psychically linked to events that had happened in the house in the past. The first half of this is pretty cool. They have a lot of shots of the girl and the killer having similar behavior and the girl even mimicing his behavior. I thought those shots were great and added a lot to the movie. In fact, I say that added to the creepiness factor, something which a lot of similar movies of the time were lacking. Of course, the killer eventually shows up and it falls in place with standard slasher fare.
I like the fact that the film makers tried to do something a little different with this and although it does turn into a generic slasher movie, I say it is still worth a watch.
Through all my years of movie watching and collecting I have never seen a VHS of this besides the time that I rented it. It is on DVD now though. I often read reviews of this where people completely confuse it with Slumber Party Massacre. I think later sequels of that movie are tied into the sequel to this movie, so I think that is where the confusion comes from.
As a slasher movie, this one is ok. The set up is about a group of girl who are having a party at a house and one of the girls is psychically linked to events that had happened in the house in the past. The first half of this is pretty cool. They have a lot of shots of the girl and the killer having similar behavior and the girl even mimicing his behavior. I thought those shots were great and added a lot to the movie. In fact, I say that added to the creepiness factor, something which a lot of similar movies of the time were lacking. Of course, the killer eventually shows up and it falls in place with standard slasher fare.
I like the fact that the film makers tried to do something a little different with this and although it does turn into a generic slasher movie, I say it is still worth a watch.
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